belle du jour
Tuesday, July 25
  while i still have time.
i wanna...
put others before me & remember giving is better than receiving.
be healthy, for my body is a temple of yours.
praise & not condemn.
uplift & not insult.
laugh & not mock.
be bold & have more faith to ask for great things.
be thankful for each morning because it means one more day.
be happy & spread the love.
be strong so others can rest.
help not linger.
use my talents because that's why you gave them to me.
learn to shut up long & realize i should use my ears.
fight for you & not cower in shame.
edify not put down.
hope beyond disappointments.
falter & remember it's okay because im only human.
stop judging and start seeing the good in people.
be able to eat my words & swallow my pride & still hold my head up high.
trust more & be more secure.
remember that Time always runs out.



i wanna start afresh. all over again.
 
Wednesday, July 19
  "what shall i do today"
thank goodness today's list was 'safer' and less painful than yesterday's :) no need to hold ur breaths!!

1) went to view apartment with parents and grandma


2) did some gardening.
i saw my maid jumping to try & reach the branches of the bougainvillea tree in my driveway so i offered to help her. whilst i reached the branches easily, the shears i was using were utterly rusty and blunt so i too was struggling to cut them off. my maid, however, had to jump but managed to snap them off, easy peasy. my maid chuckled at my feeble attempts & my fear of being pricked by the many thorns but i didnt give up. after awhile (she had removed all that were supposed to be removed. i was jus trying to prove my point that i could use the shears so i was trying with branches that DIDN'T need to be removed, fortunately my mother was preoccupied) i realized the trick is you have to cut AND snap at the sametimeeee....

3) unpacked FIRST of 13 boxes!! wootwoot.
it all started cause i was looking for my black pair of havaianas. which i didnt manage to find so i think i must've thrown them away due to lack of space. idiot me.

note: mong, ur stack of shoeboxes closest to mine has crossed the line. i am hence being robbed of valuable space. please address problem. :P
 
Sunday, July 16
  again.
hello friends.
im afraid i yet again have some sombre news.
xiao hei aka chomp, has cancer. we discovered a lump on the top of his head awhile back. my dad took him to the vet and he removed as much of it as he could and ran tests on it. the results came back depressing. the vet said nothing can be done. my mom and dad kindda wanna wait till his situation gets worse before putting him down. but i wan it done sooner.
i dunno if he's suffering but he aint bouncing and licking no more.
& that jus isnt my chomp.

:(
give me back the day when i i picked him out of the puppy litter cos he was most quiet and seemed most poor thing. the day when he'd yelp and yelp unless i carried him in my arms till he fell asleep. the days when he was no longer than the length of my elbow to my wrist.
 
Thursday, July 6
  ***
i woke up at 5:26am & thought "grrreaatt!! 7:26am in melbourne, uni website was jus updated at 7am so results are out!!!"

so after 3 sleepy cum strained eyes to see in dark attempts at signing onto comp (which i naturally took as foreboding sign) i eventually managed to get to uni website and get results. 4 of 5 of them. i got "***" for my witchhunting subject.
what is *** u say? i dunno. i click on *** and it says "unapplicable or unavaliable" so of course all kindda things start to churn in unusually rapid fashion for my brain at 5:37am in morning. did they never receive my essay. did i drop it down the wrong slot. did i fail? but no, if you failed you get a "N" or a "S". did they forget i was taking that subject? or is my lecturer jus not ready with results? can he jus not be ready? but i mean. if you say results are gonna be out, they Have to be out. it's a deadline. he doesnt even seem like a football fan.

i might email someone later on. but i dun wanna seem like im impatient and over bearing and have nothing better to do than hound very sweet lecturer from 2 million miles away. hmm. argh.
 
Wednesday, July 5
  take it from the gilmores.
"Dean...."
"wad..??"
"are you my boyfriend?"
"in the..broadest sense of the word way?"
"no, in the real, 'hi, this is Dean, my boyfriend' kindda way"
"well i am if you want me to be"
"i do"
"ok"
"so its settled."
"thats the consensus..."


in light of the many converstions ive been having these days. girls, i say to you. do a Gilmore. jus.cut to the chase. take the bull by its horns (mark, i adore u & all but i refuse to go over 2 cliches ;) ) watching rory & dean have that talk brought me back some 19mths.

 

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